Top 20 Programmer Responses

I’m not entirely sure where I spotted this - probably some random place on the Internet I guess - but it is hilarious and at the same time, scarily accurate. So accurate, in fact, that I wanted to record it somewhere so that all could share for time immemorial.

So, without further ado, here are the top 20 responses that programmers provide when bugs are reported about their software:

20. “That’s weird...”

19. “It’s never done that before.”

18. “It worked yesterday.”

17. “How is that possible?”

16. “It must be a hardware problem.”

15. “What did you type in wrong to get it to crash?”

14. “There is something funky in your data.”

13. “I haven’t touched that module in weeks!”

12. “You must have the wrong version.”

11. “It’s just some unlucky coincidence.”

10. “I can’t test everything!”

9. “This can’t be the source of that.”

8. “It works, but it hasn’t been tested.”

7. “Somebody must have changed my code.”

6. “Did you check for a virus on your system?”

5. “Even though it doesn’t work, how does it feel?”

4. “You can’t use that version on your system!”

3. “Why do you want to do it that way?”

2. “Where were you when the program blew up?”

And the number one reply from programmers when their software doesn’t work:

1. “It works on my machine!”